Dear Annabelle

Dear Annabelle,

Today was your first day of Kindergarten. Wow.

Saying that out loud, and even just typing it  out makes me go weak in the knees.

I cannot believe how time has flown by.

I am amazed at the lovely child that you have grown into. I am so lucky that you are mine.

You have been ready for school for about a year now. You have been asking when you could go ever since the school year started last year for your brothers.

And I would say "Just one more year" and you would smile excitedly just thinking about it coming up and I would smile excitedly because I had you to myself for another year. Then it was "only six more months" and then "only six more weeks!"

And finally it was time.

And I have to be ok with that.

You are more than ready though. You are so very smart for your age. And mature.

You, having a September birthday, will likely be the oldest in your class.

But that role suites you well. You are a take charge kinda gal. A leader.

Today when you came home you told me that you already had made four best friends. And I was not a bit surprised by this.

We dropped you off first this morning.

You had your ginormous backpack on your back, the gift we made for your teacher in your hands, and a huge toothless grin on your face.

 VERY happy to be there.

You were shown the cubby that is to be yours for the next year and very proudly put your things away.

Right next to a backpack that was identical to yours.

You found the desk that you had picked out at Meet your Teacher and sortof reluctantly sat down. Still with a smile though.

You were greeted with smiling colorful cutouts with your name on them.



And your brand new pencil box with crayons inside. You were so proud to buy those for yourself when we went school supply shopping. It was finally your turn too.

Your teacher Mrs. Palmer is very nice and I think you both will get along splendidly this year. She seems to genuinely care about the children

that are handed over into her care.

She will get you more than me for the next nine months. She will be watching you grow, wiping your tears, taking care of you when you scrape your knee, and answering life's questions for you.

I hope that she does a good job. I hope she makes you feel loved and looks after you.

I think that she will though so I have to step back and leave you for this next chapter in your life.

We were both strong and neither one of us actually cried. A can't believe it. BUT I can still feel the lump in my throat and the sting in my eyes so I am not counting it as a success just yet (READ: when I go to bed tonight I will lay in the dark and think about it all and have a good ugly cry. But I'm o.k. with that.)

I made you a Kindergarten quilt to take in your backpack for nap time.

I sewed some love into every single stitch so that when you wrap up in it it will give you a hug from me.

You say that it works.

When I picked you up there had been some issues with the drive through pick up lane and it took a very long time for our car to get to the doors to get you.

I hate that on your very first day of school there had to be some apprehension, especially at the end of the day. I was so worried that you would think that I forgot you.

And unfortunately I think you kind of did, judging by the look on your face as you were standing on the concrete in a sea of other children looking blindly out at the congested car line, searching for me.

But you found me and we both shared a squeal and a "YAY!!"" as you got in the car.

I am so sorry baby girl. NOT the feelings I wanted you to feel at the end of your first day.

But you had your backpack unzipped and folder out before we hit the first stop sign. You were so eager to show me everything from your big day. And I absolutely could not wait to see it.

First was the take home folder.

I am starting to see a trend where everyone is leaving the "e" off of the end of your name and I am wondering if this is going to be an issue for the next 12 years. Hm.

But yay for folders full of stuff!!!

My very favorite thing inside that folder was this adorable letter to me and your dad. It will adorn the front of the fridge for a few months and then find it's way into your keepsake box before it can get ruined with splashes of Kool-aide and spaghetti sauce. Cause this ones a keeper.

You told me and your dad in great excitement all about your day at school. You couldn't get the words out loud enough or fast enough. I think the highlight of your day was going on a hunt to find the gingerbread man who had jumped out of the story. Apparently yall went on a journey through the entire school looking for him. It was a hoot.

In between laughs, squeals, and stories about the day you chowed down on your left over lunch.

You were a hungry girl...who is used to grazing all day.

When we got home you were pleased to find a Thank You note from your teacher in your bag. She really appreciated the gift that you brought her.

It makes me glad that she can see the sweet big hearted girl that you are.

It makes me even more glad to see the pride that was beaming off of your face.
And just to celebrate my proud girl, and get some much needed "us girls" time, we baked a delicious Back to School cake.
With Sprinkles.

I know that you are going to do so well in school and succeed in everything that you do. Because thats how you do it.

I know that you will adjust to this new normal very easily. And I will do my best to adjust well too.

I am going to miss our time together.

For the past two years it has been just "us girls".
Every single day with you by my side.

I'm going to miss our trips to the grocery store. It will be weird without you in the cart. Or in the backseat talking to me in the rearview.

Our fabric hunting at Hobby Lobby. Library days. Our cuddles on the couch.

I'm just going to miss you. My life as I know it.

You are my best friend.

And honestly I have been dreading this day since school got out for the Summer last year. I knew your turn was coming up.

But that is my selfishness.

I am going to enjoy watching you grow and learn this year.

And I will be SO proud. The proudest mom there ever was.

"I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living my baby you'll be."

Love,

Mama